KIAAN

“You’re thirty five now, by the time we were your age, we had four children.” I stop mid bite and drop my fork back in my plate. This pasta isn’t my favourite either. Dad likes it so we all eat it.

I look up at everyone’s expecting face and sigh. “Don’t you have more fucked up children of yours to worry about, mumma?” She gives me a seething glare. If I continue on the track I’m currently on, she will send her sandal flying at my head too.

My mother is double of whatever people believe Asian parents are. She is half Indian and a bit less than half Korean. She is the scariest person I know but she is also ready to die for us.

“You dare cuss in front of your parents, you brat!” Argh. I look at my dad for some help but he stares at his plate, his empty plate. Him and I are extremely close but he doesn’t dare say a word against his lobster.

And who the fuck calls the love of their life, lobster?!

“I’m not asking you to marry someone but at least find a girl! You can’t date someone for two months and expect them to be your life partner. You at least need to date for a few years and then marry them. At this rate you’ll be married at forty!

And if you want children, when are you going to have them? At fifty?!” Dear god. She is so tiny, yet she yells louder than all of us combined.

“So what did you want me to do mumma? Have a child at twenty three before I’ve even finished college?!” I shut my mouth the second I realise my mistake. She knows I hold a grudge.

They had me when they were way too young. The first few years of life maybe hazy in my memory but I remember how I was shuffled around my grandparents and aunt because both of my parents were busy trying to get a degree and a job.

I don’t think I can ever do what they did. They managed everything and became successful and took care of everything but I missed most of my early years with them. Technically it was just the three of us for five years before my brothers were born but I barely had a few months with them.

The rest were with everyone else. Dad looks at me sharply. Not because I said anything wrong but because it would hurt his wife. I know it would and I feel bad for saying it. My mother’s lip wobbles but she purses her lips, and straightens in her seat.

“I know we weren’t perfect in the beginning but we did all we could to raise all of you well. I know I’m not the ideal mother-“

“That’s not what I meant-“

“-but I tried my best to raise you all well. You all came out sane so I would say I did something right.” A snort greets us and we all collectively glare at the menace beside me. My younger brother. Vihaan.

A lost case.

He sobers up quickly and focuses on his food but he has already dug up his grave. “And you! You’re thirty! Find someone so I don’t have to give you the same lecture.”

He frowns, “what did I even do?” You made a sound. His twin, Ridhaan sits next to our mother and keeps his head low and on his plate. There is a reason he is mumma’s favourite.

He doesn’t do shit that would make her upset. He lives his life pretty clean. Mumma rubs her temple. “Kiaan. J-just tell me you’ll at least look for someone.” I will not. “Okay.”

“AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!”

I look towards the door, just as horrified as everyone else. Meher runs in and then up the stairs. Still screaming. It doesn’t look like she is scared, she is just screaming at something I’m sure she did herself.

She doesn’t even live in Mumbai and this is her coming back to see us for the first time in the last four months.

“Why weren’t the three of us enough for you?” This nutcase brother of mine gets another glare from both of our parents before they get up from the table to follow the screaming penguin upstairs.

“Dad actually got a vasectomy after the two of you.” I tell them. Forks clutter. “Then?” Ridhaan asks. I shrug. “It didn’t work, obviously.” He goes back to his food and Vihaan realises there was a chance of our sister not existing and gets bummed out about it.

My phone rings and I abandon the pasta I don’t like anyway. I excuse myself and move towards the balcony of my parent’s house. “Yeah?”

My assistant gushes from the other end. “We found the perfect people to pitch your idea for a new retreat to. They mostly work in hotels but they have been expanding lately.”

I hum. “And who are they?”

“It’s the Rajvansh Hotels. They have started expanding and I found that we can pitch the idea to Kriti Raichand. She is the Head of acquisitions and she loves new ideas. We can-“

“No.”

“Excuse me?” My assistant sounds genuinely shocked and I don’t blame her. This is a big opportunity. “You did a great job but I will not be discussing business with her.”

“Come on sir. That is extremely misogynistic of you and that too in this age-“

“I have no issues discussing business with a woman. I have issues discussing it with Kriti. I’m not working with her.”

“But why not?”

“Because I said so.” I hang up and hope she doesn’t press it further. I’m not working with Kriti Raichand. I’m not touching that, even with a ten foot pole.

———

MEHER

On a scale of 1-10, how badly have I fucked up?

One fucking hundred!

I had one job. One single job. Go to work, learn from your mentor, tail him in court to learn about all the tips and tricks so you can be a lawyer as good as he is. I needed to work under him, learn my work, file cases, draft contracts, assist him in actual cases and all the other lawyer stuff.

But what did I do?

I did everything I was supposed to but I’m a ridiculous person who just had to go one step ahead and now I’m closer to being fired than I am to completing my training!

I scream again but this time I muffle it with my pillow. I ruin my own life. Every single time I pull some weird shit and put myself and my career in jeopardy. This is fucking ridiculous.

I raise my head up from the pillow to breathe but scream for an entirely different reason. I have told both of them to knock and they mostly do but this is an Indian house, how much more can I expect?

“What is wrong with you?” My mother frowns. Her and I look very similar. Her, Kiaan bhaiya and I look the same. While my other two brothers look like dad. The genetics worked in the weirdest way and now all four of us don’t look related.

I start crying again. Her question taking me back to the shit I pulled. “Mumma!! My life is ruined!” My father shows some human emotion and hugs me. He rubs my back and tries to calm me down. “What happened?”

“I fucked up.” My mother throws her hands up in the air. “Why is everyone cussing in this house now?” She cusses sometimes too.

“I’m never going to get into any law firm ever after I’m fired from this one.” It’s the biggest law firm in the country. I even moved to Udaipur for this job but now I won’t have one because I’m an idiot.

“My sweet girl, why would they fire you?” My father asks. “You’re smart, you do your job well, you have only assisted in three cases and the firm won two of them.” The third one is still ongoing, we haven’t lost yet.

“I would say your track record is pretty good. Why would anyone fire you?” I pull away from him and look at my mother. She raises a brow in question.

“Well, I- I……..”

“My goodness, spit it out. What did you do that you’re so definite they would fire you? You can just say you made a mistake at whatever you did wrong-“

“I kissed my boss.”

Jaws, on the floor. Dad looks horrified while mumma looks like she wants to smack me on the face. Hard. “What did you just say?” She asks and I lower my head in shame.

“I kissed my boss.” Dad gets off the bed to pace around before holding mumma back so she doesn’t go all hulk. I think this is the right time to get it all out. “And he didn’t kiss me back.”

“Oh my god. I don’t know which one is worse.” Mumma shakes her head while dad glares. “They are both bad. This is harassment.”

Shit. I didn’t even consider the harassment part. I just thought he would hate me now because he would think I’m desperate and in his fashion he would tell me to pack my desk and get lost like he has done a million times to other people he believes are incompetent.

He has fired more people in the last year since I’ve joined them than I have seen join the firm. He doesn’t fire people for no reason but he doesn’t tolerate incompetence and disregard for others.

And I just went ahead and kissed him like a fucking fool! I cry more and fall face first into the mattress. Life sucks! Now I have no way of ever becoming a successful lawyer because I, a twenty five year old hellion harassed my thirty five year old boss.

The rich as fuck, stunning, six foot something giant boss who is always annoyed, grumpy, emotionally unavailable and pissed off at the whole world, boss.

I’m more screwed than a fuck boy who gets caught cheating. But of course, my reasons are different.

“What will I do now?!!!” All this is happening because of him! Aakash Raichand is everything I dreamt of as a young girl.

He is older, sexier, prettier and above everything else, emotionally unavailable. How can I resist that?!!!!

Shouldn’t have kissed him though. Fuck!

———

NAIRA

I lean my head on Abeer’s shoulder and watch the movie he picked. My brother is very particular about the things I watch. He watches all of them beforehand to make sure there are no jump scares, no sudden plot twist, nothing that could trigger me.

“This film is boring.”

“It’s all you can watch.” Fucking tadpole. I’m older than him and yet he gets to boss me around. I wish I hadn’t fainted in front of him when I was fifteen. That traumatised him too much.

From then on, he has taken it upon himself to look after me like a bodyguard. Except he feels more like the hellhound keeping me in my cage. The main door bangs and we both watch our father walk in with frustrated steps.

Mom makes her way to him. “What happened?”

“I swear Nisha if one more person asks me to marry one of our daughters to them or their children for business, I will throw hands!”

I look back at the television and Abeer looks at me. “Are not the least bit interested di?”

“In knowing what 70 year old wants to marry me now? Nope.”

“Maybe it’s a 70 year old’s son?” I glare at him. “Do I look like marriage material to you?” I ask before putting the nebuliser back on my nose. I don’t always need it, but I was having trouble breathing today.

My brother turns to dad, “did they want di or Aira?” Aira is the youngest of the three of us. While she should’ve been the baby of the family, she spent most of her time looking after me until she did one thing for herself and somehow fell into more responsibilities.

Dad glares. “Why does it matter? I’m not bartering either of them like goats.” He then walks closer and kisses my forehead. “Do you not feel well today beta?”

I pull the machine away and take a big breath. “I’m okay dad. Just a little breathing issue. Nothing big.” He frowns but doesn’t say much. I hate that he blames himself. My father has shouldered way too much pain all his life and when we believed things would be okay, I became the problem.

My heart is pretty useless too, much like dad’s and the second the doctor mentioned it being genetic, dad fell down more and more into guilt. I don’t understand how it’s his fault that genes are a bitch.

He sits down beside me in thought. I know that face. That’s the face he makes when he is worried about me. I am dependent on my parents because in the condition I am, I can barely do anything.

I can move around and function like a normal human but there is a sword hanging over my head at all times that falls down multiple times a day. I paint sometimes. Though finishing a painting takes me days, sometimes months.

“Did someone specifically ask for me?” He nods. “Was he 70?” I ask to lighten the mood. It doesn’t work. My father shakes his head. “Then?”

“He is thirty five. Rich, handsome, powerful, all the normal things someone would look for.”

“But we can’t marry because I’m sick. Because that’s too much and we would never trick anyone, right dad?”

He shakes his head again. “He knows you’re sick.” I blink. “What?”

“He knows you’re sick, Naira. He knows what your condition is and he still specifically asked to marry you. He said he would take care of you. That he doesn’t mind or care what your condition is.”

How is that even possible? Only the million people in our family know about my condition. Nobody on the outside-

“What’s his name?” I ask. “Arjun.”

That vermin. Does he not know what ‘no’ means? He went to my father?! And attacked the one weak pulse? My dad knows that him and mom won’t be there forever and they worry who would look after me then.

I truly believe I’m going to die before them but I’m not going to say it to their face. Not again. I’ll go talk to that pest.

I wait until everyone is asleep to get out of the house and take a cab. I don’t drive and I’m not getting the driver because he is a snitch. For Abeer of all people. At least tell an older person.

The rain starts somewhere during my ride and I’m completely drenched by the time I stand in front of his house. He is the king of Udaipur but since he just met my father I know he is in Mumbai in one of his properties.

I refuse to move from the door in front of his house and let the water wash away my anger. But then the door opens and he steps out with an umbrella and the same anger returns tenfold.

“YOU!!!” I scream and lunge at him. Doesn’t work. I get my height from my mother while he gets his from god knows where. He is probably as tall as my dad or maybe an inch shorter and it does not help.

“Calm down, Naira.” The audacity. He brings me under the umbrella. I step away and out of the shade. “You went to my father?! I told you I don’t want to marry you so you went to my father? How dare you?!”

“What else was I supposed to do?” He sounds so calm, I hate his gut even more. “I asked you but you gave me all the nonsense about how you’re sick and a liability and blah blah. Stop treating yourself like a burden. Nobody thinks that about you other than you.”

“What I or other people think about me is none of your concern! Mind your own fucking business!” The rain pelts harder. It’s almost bruising and I still stand away from the shade. I am stubborn.

I hate life and I hate myself. I never really got to live. I never got to travel much because planes can be problematic. I can never be near extremely loud noises. I can’t watch horror films or anything that can be triggering.

I need to be close to a source of oxygen at all times. I can faint anytime anywhere. I visit hospital, more than I visit my favourite restaurant. And just so I don’t get lonely, my whole family bends backwards to accommodate me and give up on their favourite things.

I am a fucking liability!

“I don’t even make a living for myself. I am financially dependent on my family!” He shrugs. “You can be financially dependent on me, I make more than enough.”

I will beat the shit out of this fucker if it’s the last thing I do. I go to land a smack on him but a mountainous man stands between us.

“As his bodyguard, I would ask you to please keep a distance.”

I narrow my eyes. “As a pissed off woman, I’ll tell you to back off before I beat the both of you.” I believe he was coming to pick me up and throw me away but Arjun stops him.

“No matter what she does, don’t lay a hand on her. She is pretty small, what’s the most she can do?” I land a punch on his bicep.

“There is more where that came from, your majesty.” I throw another punch. He purses his lips, absolutely unaffected. “Stop being a menace.”

“You wanted to marry this menace.”

“I still want to marry this menace.”

“What is your problem, Arjun?”

“You are. Why are you being so stubborn? You hate being a burden on your parents even though you aren’t one then leave them. Marry me, be my liability.”

I raise a brow, the fight leaving my body as exhaustion claws its way up. “So you do think I’m a liability.”

“What are you fighting for Naira?” I don’t know. “Why do you want to marry me so bad?” I ask instead.

“Because I like you.”

“You don’t even know me!”

“I know enough. And I can know the rest after we are married.” Said no sane person ever.

“No.” I reiterate. He throws the umbrella and his hands in the air. “You are hopeless.” I know genius. I turn to leave but my head feels dizzy. Perfect timing!

If I’m not home before everyone wakes up, I’ll probably kill half of them with worry and the other half with a heart attack. “I- I need to go home.”

The vermin’s brain starts working because he picks me up and puts me in his car. I worry about ruining his leather seat but he is soaked himself as he gets in the driver seat to start driving.

“Think about it Naira. I know your heart condition and I promise I’ll never hold it against you. Stop being stubborn and just let me take care of you. Not out of obligation but because I truly want to.”

————